Monday, June 18, 2007


It is when you stop going along with the crowd and start realizing that there are many things about yourself that you didn't know and may not like. You start feeling insecure and wonder where you will be in a year or two, but then get scared because you barely know where you are now.

You start realizing that people are selfish and that, maybe, those friends that you thought you were so close to aren't exactly the greatest people you have ever met, and the people you have lost touch with are some of the most important ones. What you don't recognize is that they are realizing that too, and aren't really cold, catty, mean or insincere, but that they are as confused as you.

You look at your job... and it is not even close to what you thought you would be doing, or maybe you are looking for a job and realizing that you are going to have to start at the bottom and that scares you.

Your opinions have gotten stronger. You see what others are doing and find yourself judging more than usual because suddenly you realize that you have certain boundaries in your life and are constantly adding things to your list of what is acceptable and what isn't. One minute, you are insecure and then the next, secure.

You laugh and cry with the greatest force of your life. You feel alone and scared and confused. Suddenly, change is the enemy and you try and cling on to the past with dear life, but soon realize that the past is drifting further and further away, and there is nothing to do but stay where you are or move forward.

You get your heart broken and wonder how someone you loved could do such damage to you. Or you lie in bed and wonder why you can't meet anyone decent enough that you want to get to know better. Or maybe you love someone but love someone else too and cannot figure out why you're doing this because you know that you aren't a bad person. One night stands and random hook ups start to look cheap. Getting wasted and acting like an idiot starts to look pathetic. You go through the same emotions and questions over and over, and talk with your friends about the same topics because you cannot seem to make a decision. You worry about loans, money, the future and making a life for yourself... and while winning the race would be great, right now you'd just like to be a contender!

What you may not realize is that every one reading this relates to it.
We are in our best of times and our worst of times, trying as hard as we can to figure this whole thing out. Send this to your twenty-something friends... maybe it will help someone feel like they aren't alone in their state of confusion...
We call it the "Quarter-life Crisis."

U may have read this before.. i paste it here now cos i and my husband think that now,i am going through this phase.he he :-)


John said...

Quarter life crisis.. heheh!! Indeed. Nice post DD. :)

Nanditha Prabhu said...

you are tagged!

Radha said...

Its quite accurate, except the part about people in 20s getting more judgemental... I think teenagers are very judgemental, people in their twenties become more accepting of differences in people. Dont you think so?

MeMyself_n_I said...

wow.......growing up ain't all that appealing anymore. wish i could just make time stand still, live in this phase of my life forever. coz ultimately, however much i crib n moan, nothing beats college days.

peter pan's got a fan.

Bob-kat said...

So, ho called in my head and wrote it down?!

It happens again when you get older y'know. In fact these feelings to a greater or lesser extent never really go away!

diyadear said...

yeah man. sadly its reality :(
will come n check out :)
i think when ur a teenager, u dont actually care so much abt the decision.. its always along with friends n fun takes the lead role.. but when ur 20-something, it becomes more serious.. decisions tend to be life long.. n mostly ur required to take them as an individual..also ur values n ideas get imbibed into u... u cant cahnge them.. hence aall that is very confusing n horrid.. i wud love to be a teenager again :)

diyadear said...

thats wat i told u the other day to enjoy ur college days to the max.. they will be the ultimate joy!!!n wats this abt peter pan??
lol.i think u too r in ur twenties rt??oops thats a ahrd reality u state there..

priya said...

Such a cute post girl.

Devil Mood said...

thanks for posting it! i love and it's true - i relate to that. i'd never heard of the quarter of life crisis but it makes a lot of sense :)

pink ginger 珂琳 said...

I remember this but really don't mind reading it again.
Hope you're doing fine and god bless.

diyadear said...

i suppose u agree its bitterly true too.
glad i introduced this to u.. :)any 20-something person will be able to relate to this i presume..
ya i too am readin it for the n th time.. but each time it srtikes a new chord somehwere..

Maddy said...

yes, most of it is bang on the they say..

welcome to life..

akanksha said...

Hey i bumped into ur blog but i now i am glad i did..really nice post...u put in words wt we go through every single day....good work!

Tapak said...

Very nice post. I wish the college days were back.

Keshi said...

so true!!

and u realise that nothing is forever :)


Cris said...

Wait until you get to the thirties, I thought it was even better! :-) Have a nice week!

Little Miss Muffet said...

i couldn't agree more!

MeMyself_n_I said...

oh peter pan was the fellow from neverland who never wanted to grow up.

diyadear said...

ya u said it.. welcome to life.
thanks for dropping in.. n these r not my words.. :)sorry i forgot to mention it..
ya i wish so too..
cris, u mean 20's r better??:O then i better start enjoying this more..
miss muffet :))

oooooo ya ya now i got it.. yes peter pan fan indeed :)

Nanditha Prabhu said...

this seems to be a phase through which all have to pass at some point of their lifes!
yes this is the time when we want to cling to our past , brood over our future and forget to live the moment!
its the nature of human mind i suppose!
I also have been through this , but now I enjoy and celebrate life by living the moment!

Maddy said...

oho - u are reading 'odessa file' that was a brilliant book, and the movie was also quite good...all the ealry forsyth books were classics!!

Ps said...

Oh yes--had linked this write up in one of my posts..a friend of mine too had put this up.Its a good one.

tulipspeaks said...

ah.. can't agree more! :)


sweata said...

nice post !!!..sweta

sweata said...

nice post!

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